


What Comes After the Storm?

by FrankRabbit



Category: citrus - サブロウタ | citrus - Saburouta
Genre: F/F
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-08-07
Updated: 2020-08-07
Packaged: 2021-03-05 23:53:32
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,434
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/25773904
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/FrankRabbit/pseuds/FrankRabbit
Summary: Imagined to be set sometime in the near future of the ongoing narrative found in Citrus Plus (after Chapter 12).
Relationships: Mizusawa Matsuri/Taniguchi Harumi
Comments: 6
Kudos: 84





	What Comes After the Storm?

What Comes After the Storm?

The city shudders under heavy rain.  
A surge of slowly moving umbrellas stream up the street. Two figures run against this current. They move fast, but take measure not to crash into anyone. If they did, they would surely be caught by the man that doggedly pursues them.  
Harumi turns a corner at the end of the street with Matsuri following closely behind. Both hurriedly move down this new path.  
Harumi spots a side street and grabs Matsuri’s hand as she pulls the younger girl towards it. They take refuge behind a large refuse bin. Some cover above gives them respite from the downpour.  
Matsuri squats, breathing heavily, clutching a large brown envelope.  
Harumi peaks over the top of the bin looking out towards the main street.  
The man that had been chasing them darts past and away from where they are now hiding.  
Harumi turns, and squats shoulder to shoulder with Matsuri.  
Matsuri puffs her cheeks out.  
“That was a close one.” Matsuri says with a smile.  
“Are you stupid?” Harumi asks, not really needing an answer, “He could have been somebody dangerous. What if he was some kind of criminal? He looked like he could have been Yakuza.”  
“Stop over reacting,” Matsuri says.  
“What were you even doing?” Harumi asks.  
“He said he wanted a few feet pictures and was willing to pay a good price. I was going to give him the ones in this envelope, then take his money before he realised that they weren’t mine. But he grabbed me. The next thing I heard your voice and…”  
“You really are stupid.” Harumi cuts in, “You think you can just outsmart everyone and get away with it. You might be clever, but he’s a grown man. To him you’re just some…cute little schoolgirl.”  
“Cute?”  
“What could you have done if he overpowered you?” Harumi asks dreading the thought, “He could’ve taken you by force. He could’ve…”  
“But he didn’t. I had Harumi-Senpai to save me.” Matsuri says with sarcastic childish glee.  
“And what about next time?” Harumi asks, “What if I wasn’t able to track you down?”  
Matsuri pauses for a second, “There won’t be a next time.”  
“Are you sure? It seems like you’re returning to your old ways again.”  
“Old ways?” Matsuri asks inquisitively.  
Harumi stands tall and looks down on Matsuri.  
“You know exactly what I mean.” Harumi says, getting to the point, “You get bored with life and start acting reckless. Yuzu says it's a recurring theme.”  
Matsuri stands and faces Harumi.  
“What exactly did she tell you?” asks Matsuri.  
“She told me to look after you. She said that she can’t always be there, and that it hurts her when you do stupid things and she isn’t around to stop it. She asked if she could rely on me to help if you ever needed it…and well…here I am.”  
“She shouldn’t have said that. I can look after myself.”  
“Evidently not,” is Harumi’s cutting reply “Come on…we need to get out of here.”  
Harumi reaches into her bag and pulls out an umbrella. She opens it up over both of their heads.  
Matsuri puts the large brown envelope into the nearby bin that was their hiding spot moments ago.  
They walk side by side back out into the main street, heading towards the nearest Metro station.  
“How did you know where to find me?” asks Matsuri.  
“Mei said that you’d sent her here before, and it was likely one of your meeting spots. I was looking around, and I saw that man grabbing someone’s arm. You had your hood up so I didn’t know it was you. Well…at least until you started shouting ‘pervert’ at him.”  
They continue to walk silently down the street. Harumi keeps her focus straight ahead, whilst Matsuri gives a cautionary glance over her shoulder in order to make sure the man isn’t following them.  
They make it to the Metro station and get onto the train.  
They stand next to one another, grabbing hold of different handles.  
It’s quiet in the carriage, and they share the silence all around them in the company of one another. But whilst Matsuri’s is one of awkwardness, Harumi’s is one of frustrated contemplation.  
Matsuri looks up at Harumi and notices the aggrieved look on her face. Matsuri tries to take the older girl’s free hand.  
“I’m sor…” Matsuri begins.  
Harumi pushes her hand away. The apology goes unfinished.  
After getting off the train and escaping from the Metro station, they again walk under Harumi’s umbrella. The rain isn’t as heavy as before, but it still falls all about them on these quieter streets located outside of the city centre,  
Harumi takes out her phone and begins typing.  
“Who are you texting?” asks Matsuri.  
“I’m telling everyone I’ve found you.” replies Harumi “Nobody could get hold of you. You skipped school without warning again. And everyone has been worried sick...again.”  
“I just needed some time alone.”  
“You need to tell people that. We’d understand.”  
A glimmer of regret briefly touches Matsuri’s face.  
A text message notification beeps on Harumi’s phone.  
“Yuzu wants to know if you’ll be at school tomorrow?” Harumi asks reading the message.  
“I’m not sure.” Matsuri replies, “Look…I best head home.”  
Matsuri turns as if to head back to the station. Harumi grabs her hand.  
“Come with me first. I have something to say to you, and you’re going to listen to me this time.” Harumi stoically demands.  
“Can’t it wait till later? Or at least until your mood has lifted?”  
“No. If I don’t say it now, I don’t think I ever will.”  
“If you’re going to tell me off some more, I’d rather just get it over and done with here and now.”  
“I’m not going to do this in public.”  
“Where are we going then?”  
Harumi thinks for a second, “Let's go to my house.”  
Mitsuko kneels on the floor of the living room in the Taniguchi household. She sips at her tea and turns her head slightly towards the nearby hallway as the front door opens.  
“I’m home.” Harumi calls out.  
“Welcome back.” Mitsuko replies as she stands to greet her younger sister.  
Harumi and Matsuri appear in the open doorway leading to the living room.  
“Hello Oneesan.” Matsuri says to Mitsuko bowing informally.  
“Good to see you again.” replies Mitsuko “You seem…a little more reserved than usual.”  
“I’m about to get scolded.” Matsuri says with a sarcastic sigh.  
“I’m going to my room.” Harumi informs Mitsuko, “This way.” she commands to Matsuri.  
Harumi walks off. Matsuri gives another little bow towards Mitsuko and shuffles off towards Harumi’s room. Mitsuko returns to her tea.  
Harumi walks into her bedroom and heads to her desk. Matsuri stands silently besides the door.  
“Please come in.” says Harumi, “Take a seat on my bed.”  
Matsuri walks over to it and sits. Harumi wheels the chair from the nearby desk and places it in front of Matsuri. This looks like it’s going to be an interrogation.  
Harumi sits quietly, looking directly at Matsuri. Matsuri returns her gaze.  
“Aren’t you going to say some…” Matsuri begins.  
“What’s your problem?” Harumi interrupts.  
“Eh?”  
“What’s your problem? Specifically…what’s your problem with me?”  
“I’m not sure what you mean.”  
“Yes, you do.” Harumi states, not letting any emotions get the better of her, “For a while now you’ve been…observing me. But not in a friendly way. You’ve been...scrutinising me. In that way you do with others when you’re planning something. I know I’m not just imagining it. You’ve been antagonistic towards me. You’ve been argumentative with me. And you’ve been getting angry at me almost every time we talk. So, I’ll ask again, what is your problem?”  
Matsuri sits silently looking at Harumi. Their eyes are locked as if trying to figure each other out.  
A wry smile appears on Matsuri’s face.  
“You love Yuzu, don’t you?” Matsuri says coldly.  
Harumi's face flinches slightly. “What do you mean I love Yuzu?” she asks.  
“You’re in love with Yuzu.”  
“Is that a joke?”  
“No.” Matsuri responds, “Like you said, I’ve been watching you. I’ve seen the way you’ve been with her recently, almost as if you finally figured something out. Those pained looks you give her, the moments you’re cherishing just being with her…how you act when she’s not around. It’s the reason you’ve been avoiding me. It’s why you’ve been treating me differently than usual. You’re in love with her, and you’re still uncertain of how to deal with it.”  
A pause. “…And what if I was?” Harumi finally asks, “What would you do?”  
“I would do everything in my power to stop you from trying to take her away from Mei. She’s my best friend. I’ve known her since I was a kid, and in all those years, I’ve never seen her this happy. I will do everything I can to protect that happiness. No matter how much she ends up hating me. No matter how much you end up hating me either.”  
Harumi turns her gaze away.  
Matsuri smiles triumphantly. "I take it we're done here?" she says.  
Matsuri stands up and walks towards the door. She reaches for the handle but stops as Harumi begins to speak.  
“You know, you are without a doubt one of the cleverest people I know. I have never told you this, but…I admire you. You’re always two steps ahead of everyone. Most of the time you act like a fool, but you’re so smart. Honestly, it makes me envious. I know at school that many of the other girls are gifted in their studies, but nobody thinks like you think. You are…most of the time…remarkable.”  
Harumi looks at the back of Matsuri who continues to faces the door.  
“You once asked me why I couldn’t trust you like I trust Yuzu.” Harumi says, “And I’ve thought a lot about that, because it's true. I spent weeks trying to figure out why. Is it because I'm intimidated by you? Am I scared of you? Do I think you're dangerous? Maybe. But I realised that it's mainly because it’s so much easier to trust Yuzu. I know you both care a lot about those around you, but you are so much more single-minded. Once you jump to a conclusion about something, nobody will ever change your mind. Even when you’re wrong. But I suppose you think you're never wrong. However, that because I didn't trust you, we’ve ended up in this situation. So, before you go, I’m going to trust you. I’m going to tell you something that I can’t even tell Yuzu.”  
Harumi stands from her chair. Matsuri is unmoving.  
“I do love Yuzu.” Harumi says gently, “I’ve never met anyone like her in my life. Before her I was always on my own. Every day I was living a lie at that school. I didn’t have any friends…and when I came home at night it was either just me and Mitsuko, or, more often than not, me on my own. Then I met Yuzu. She came into my life like a some crazy and colourful typhoon that swept me off my feet, and changed everything. As a consequence, I’ve met so many good people that I now call friends. I’ve had so many incredible experiences that have changed me for the better. I even got to meet you. Yeah, we’ve had our ups and downs, but the person you are has helped me understand so much more about the others. You have this incredible way of drawing the truth out of people. You may not have noticed, but you’ve even made me face certain truths about myself. I thank you for that. I hope in return, I can do the same for you.”  
“I don’t think…” begins Matsuri.  
“Please let me finish.” Harumi says cutting her off, "...Even with that incredible intuition for reading people, and that special ability you have to understand the situations they are in, you have somehow managed to completely misread what’s going on here. I love Yuzu as a friend. Nothing more. I am not in love with her.”  
Matsuri shakes her head in disagreement and takes hold of the door handle.  
“Wait.” Harumi says, with a tone that is almost pleading.  
Matsuri’s keeps a hold of the door handle but does not turn it. It’s as if her body itself is conflicted as her mind struggles to decide on whether to leave or not. After a few moments of indecision, her arm falls back to her side.  
Harumi takes a step forward towards her.  
“I’ve always tried to figure out why you like to interfere in other people’s relationships.” Harumi begins to explain, “At first, I was very wary of you. I thought you just saw it all as one big game. That you got pleasure out of testing people’s limits. But the closer I got to you, the more I realised something…”  
Matsuri slowly turns away from the door to face Harumi.  
“You’re terrified of being alone.” Harumi says with conviction.  
A look of self-anguish flashes into Matsuri’s eyes.  
“Ah, it looks like I’ve found a crack in your shield.” Harumi states with a wry smile of her own this time.  
Harumi takes another step forward towards Matsuri.  
“You meddle in the affairs of others, because you don’t want to be left behind.” Harumi continues, “You get involved because you think if you help them in your own way, and it all works out for the best, they’ll remember your contribution and keep you by their side. You did that with Yuzu and Mei, and you’re still doing it now. But what you fail to realise is, the people you endlessly interfere with would still want you by their side, even if you didn’t interfere at all. These people are your friends. They care about you. They want you in their lives. And it isn’t because of what you do…it’s because of who you are. But your need to always be a major part of everything that’s going on, your desire to dictate things from the shadows, will eventually blow up in your face. You’ll make a mistake somewhere along the way, and it will drive the people that you care about away. One day you’re going to find yourself in the one place you don’t want to be. Completely alone.”  
Matsuri’s eyes brim with tears.  
Harumi takes another step forward. She’s closer now. Almost within reaching distance.  
“But I know the good in you. I’ve seen that despite your tough girl act, you have some much kindness and love for those around you. I know how you always try your best to help the important people in your life. I’m aware of the fact that you force yourself to suffer, just so others can find joy. It may sometimes go unnoticed, but never to me. And with the time we’ve spent together, the moments I’ve spent watching you, being with you, and trying to understand you, I’ve come to learn something…something that you won’t want to hear from me, especially because you refuse to accept it yourself.”  
Matsuri looks forlorn. Unable to escape the coming truth.  
“You don’t think that you’re worthy of love, do you?” Harumi says.  
Despite her attempts at fighting them back, tears begin to fall down Matsuri’s face.  
Harumi continues, “You live hoping that the love others feel for one another will someday be enough. That maybe one day you’ll find happiness if everyone around you finds it for themselves. It’s selfless. It’s admirable. But I know it won’t ever be enough. It wouldn’t be enough for anyone. We all deserve our own happiness. We all deserve love. And no matter what you’ve told yourself, in order to convince yourself that you don’t deserve love, I know that you do.”  
More slow-falling tears begin their descent from Matsuri’s weeping eyes.  
Harumi takes another step forward. She’s close enough now to wipe away Matsuri's tears, but before she can, Matsuri turns her face to the floor, unable to look at the girl standing opposite.  
“All of that self-loathing has betrayed your instincts,” Harumi says softly, “It’s blinded you to certain truths. You spend so much time looking outwards, that you’ve neglected to look in. You think I’m in love with Yuzu, and you’ve probably convinced yourself that no other explanation could be given as to why I’ve suddenly changed. But…I swear on both our hearts that you couldn’t be further from the truth.”  
Harumi takes Matsuri’s right hand in her left. Matsuri still doesn’t look up from her sadness.  
Harumi takes a deep breath, “You’ve become so fixated on the love other people have for one another, hat you haven’t even considered the kind of love that they might have for you. You think it would be impossible for someone to love you, and because you've closed off your heart in order to protect yourself, you think you will never find it. In fact, you probably wouldn’t notice it, even if was standing right in front of your face."  
Harumi looks down to the floor trying to find conviction. She takes another deep breath before looking back towards Matsuri once more.  
"You believe that you don’t deserve love…" Harumi says, "...and yet…here it is. Waiting for you to look up…and see it staring back at you.”  
Matsuri looks up and stares towards Harumi.  
Harumi tenderly stares back at her.  
“I’m not in love with Yuzu.” Harumi says assuredly. “I’m in love with you Matsuri.”  
Matsuri stands still and silent. Momentarily unable to process those words. A million thoughts race through her mind all at once.  
Harumi smiles gently. Truthfully.  
She tenderly wipes the tears from Matsuris eyes with her free hand, before slowly leaning forward towards Matsuri.  
Their bodies closing in. Their faces almost touching.  
Matsuri is more nervous than she’s ever been in her life. She closes her eyes. Her heart beats so fast in her chest that she feels like it could burst.  
Harumi’s hand reaches past Matsuri and turns the door handle.  
Matsuri moves awkwardly to the side as Harumi opens the bedroom door.  
Harumi walks outside and back into the hallway.  
Matsuri stands unmoving for a second trying to take in what’s just happened, and perhaps more importantly, what was just said. She then exits the room and heads down the hallway after Harumi, almost in a daze.  
Harumi politely shows Matsuri out of the house.  
She stands in the open doorway whilst Matsuri turns to face her.  
The rain has now stopped. Sunlight is beginning to find it's way into the world again after the storm.  
Matsuri is unable to say anything. For the first time in her life she is rendered speechless. The warm blush of her face talks for itself.  
“Will I see you at school tomorrow?” Harumi asks.  
“Ye…yes…” Matsuri musters up. “Did…erm…do you really…mean it?”  
“Yes.” Harumi says with the warmness of a heartfelt smile. "You don't have to give me a reply now. But I've trusted you with with my heart, and with my love. Please don't tell anyone else about this until you've had time to figure out what it is you want to say back to me."  
“O…okay." mumbles Matsuri "Thank you.”  
“Okay then, see you tomorrow.”  
Harumi closes the door.  
Matsuri lingers for a moment. Her face is suddenly awash with frustration, knowing she should have said something more. She takes a step closer towards the now closed door.  
“I…love you too.” Matsuri says softly, as if trying to whisper through the door. “I...always...have.”  
She then turns away to face the outside world once more.  
Smiling, she places a hand on her chest, almost as if she’s counting the beats per second of her racing heart.  
Matsuri walks away from the house.  
Inside the house Harumi stands by the door.  
Smiling, she places a hand on her chest, almost as if she’s counting the beats per second of her racing heart.  
She takes a deep breath and walks into doorway of the living room where Mitsuko continues to sip her tea.  
“That was a…quiet scolding,” says Mitsuko “I didn’t hear you raise your voice once. Is there anything you’d like to confess?”  
“No. I’ve had my fill of that today.” says Harumi “I’m going to my room.” She turns and walks away.  
Mitsuko smiles. A proud older sister.


End file.
